Sunday, July 22, 2007

I wasn't blogging for quite some time.
ok.
seriously i really got nothing to say, or should i say
i dunno what i could blog.

Wednesday 18/7/07
Another day with apel lesson and the date is quite a memorable one.
I hate to repeat myself cause when i do that mean that was in the past.

You talked to me?
It was nothing actually in everybody's eyes..
but it was different to me.
It was different..Way too different.
Someone told me maybe i should just take it one step at a time,
should i?

One month ago,
I was touched. Really touched.
Maybe to you it was nothing much but it mean alot to me.
But it was all in the past?

I started to think,
maybe i become too defensive?
Come to think of it,
I lose too many things in one month
Just one month..
I lose nearly everything
everything i can say that is important to me..
Including you.

Everything is gone just because you are gone.
Im not blaming you.
I can't and it wasnt your fault.
Just that everything came crumbling down when you are gone.

On the same day
Someone told me "文聪，你已经到了一个无可救药的地步了."
Use "无可救药" to describe me.
I was shocked to heard that,
but i think she was right.
Maybe toward you..Im already 无可救药.
Some(friends) already given up on me.

You are always in my heart.
I keep thinking of you no matter
where i go, what i do
Every place and every single thing hooked back the memories
Its sweet.
but when that happened, it hurts too cause its gone now.
Can i get it back?

Thursday
You chatted with me on msn which you used to,
but it seldom happened now.
Asked me about my blog. Isnt it all about you?
I wondered you read my blog? I know you did. I believe you did.
Sometime i even think that maybe you will be upset after reading everything.
cause i know what kind of person you are.
Maybe im wrong, i dunno you at all
I don't want you to be upset but i know im selfish.
I'm selfish.

The time now is 3:47 Am
Rains start dropping
and i didnt even notice.
Freezing cold
cold night.
Dark and cold it may be,
doesnt matter.
cuz its the same in my heart.

There seems to be alot of new faces around you.
Usually i will got to know who they are cause you used to tell me
but now ..
Alot of guys are trying to ask you for chances,
i know that.
Whether you gave them anot,
i dunno.
But i know the one is still him.

You blogged before you talk to me.
The weird thing is
I cant even get myself to read your post at one go.
My heart isnt that strong.
Every word seems to be cutting it.

Someone told me
"Maybe you shouldnt care too much about her, she's still living her life happily."
I know everyone should just live their life happily.
But i know you arent.
Deep down
you still got things bothering you.
Trying to tell me not to care too much about you?
Is that possible?
I asked myself. The answer is always there.

I still care alot what is happening to you everyday.

Friday
You'r going to chalet.
I think of the malaysia trip once again.
That trip of yours really make me experience alot.
Your messages, the feeling i have during those days and the things you told me when you return
All those,
are always on my mind.
Leaving once again but everything is just too different.

可能你从来没感觉到
可能你永远感觉不到

爱上你越来越无可救药
一天一天越来越无可救药
一生一次爱你到无可救药

我才慢慢体会到
幸福是被爱的人需要



我爱你到无可救药

Will you ever think of me at;
3:06 AM