I miss those memories. Will you come back to me?

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

What am i suppose to write here.

I really don't know.

My fingers felt so heavy now. I felt like i cant even move them.

I should have blog yesterday, at least i...

at least i tot...

whatever.

I know i shouldnt be feeling that way when i saw that.
I knew it deep down

and yet when i know the fact.

The disappointment doesnt seem to be lesser.

Why izzit always that way?

Everything so important to me mean so little or maybe nothing to you.

Just look nice?

Or maybe i should have chosen a uglier one?

To order to save me from all of these.

AHHHHHHHHH.

Why am i so happy yesterday?!
Just why?!

Today i went back to school.
Xy told me i passed by you.
I didnt realized but i wondered, did you wear it?

And you really did.
but why do you have to say that?

When i was working at vivo city last week,
i remembered a lot of things.

When we went to sentosa happily, when we play with water at the pool of vivo city, when we leave our footprints there and when you stuffed me with your leftovers at carl's junior.

One of my collegues' gf came to find him during lunch.
When i saw how sweet they are, you came to my head yet again.

Everytime when i saw couples hugging each other tightly beside me,
You are always in my mind too.
I don't like this but i cant help it.
I don't like the idea of having to look at them and you, the one i want to hold tightly in my arms is not here.

I've always say everything im feeling. I blogged about it, i told people about it,
Sometime i even say it out just right in your face.

Sometimes i felt that im selfish, only know how to say everything out without thinking about others.

But at least i did say it out.

And you, the one that always hide yourself.
Always telling people you have let go of the pasts but never did.
Always ...
Always like that.

Recently i've read something somewhere.

狮子没有安全感，也不会给别人安全感......
狮子爱不起,更怕伤.....
狮子喜欢折磨人，一会对你好，一会对你坏....
狮子喜欢自欺欺人，一直说以后一切都会好......
狮子内心很悲观，世界末日也不会在乎....
这就是一个狮子星座女孩.

For a moment, i was thinking.
Isnt this talking about you?

Then i saw this

狮子的女孩从来都不会在情人面前大声哭泣，但她几乎每晚都会躲在被窝里独自哭泣到天亮。
如果你看到了她的眼泪，请相信这不是她在博取同情，这是她这样一个内心骄傲的女子不得已的场景。

If this is true
i will love you even more.

But i know i already believe every single word.

Actually i was thinking today
i should ask you out for chibi on thursday.
cause thursday is the 8th.
You do remember that don't you

Cause i seriously believe every single time without fail when you say you wanted to let go of the past.

Maybe you really decide to let go of him and ...
you know,
accept me or something?
Hahaa.

I really wanted to watch the show
Actually all i really want is you watching it with me.
maybe on that date?
Maybe not.

It look really nice on you.
really nice.

Will you ever think of me at;
9:12 PM